Friday, October 29, 2010

Monstrously Funny Jokes

And now it's time for some jokes.

These jokes come from a book called Dracula's De-Composition Book. Published by Scholastic in 2007.

How does the Cyclops listen to Music?
On an Eye-pod

What do you do when fifty vampires show up at your house?
Hope it's Halloween

Where do you store a werewolf?
In a were-house

Why does Godzilla eat hotel rooms?
He has a suite tooth

What's Dracula's favorite circus act?
He always goes for the juggler

Where do ghosts sell their stuff?
On eeeeeeeeeeeeBay

What do zombies call it when they dig up a body and bring it home?
Take-out

Why was the witch kicked out of class?
She was hex-messaging

What kind of blood type does a pessimist have?
B negative

What's Dracula's favorite place in South Africa?
Cape Town

Did you hear about the new monster movie?
It's rated aaaaarrrgh

What happens when you photograph the Invisible Man?
Nothing develops

Why do skeletons play the piano?
They don't have organs

How do witches send packages?
By FedHex

What do you find on the windows of a ghost's house?
Shudders!

Why don't zombies have money problems?
They never worry about the cost of living

How did Quasimodo know which football team would win?
He didn't -- he just had a hunch

Why did Dr. Frankenstein stop making the monster?
He didn't have the heart to keep going!

How do you know the Invisible Man has no kids?
Because he's not apparent

Why did the witch get a detention?
She cursed at the teacher

Why did the mummy cry when he saw the pyramids?
His home was in ruins

How did the undertaker get ready for the funeral?
He re-hearsed

What happened when the Blob appeared on Broadway?
There were lots of ooze and ahs

What do you call a torturer who keeps a web journal?
A blogger flogger

What did Dracula require from his computer?
More mega-bytes

1 comment:

Michael Jones said...

I liked the one about the juggler, the others not so much.